


Lou’s notebook

by ajproctor



Series: You had to kill me, but it killed you just the same [2]
Category: Prisoner: Cell Block H (TV)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-17
Updated: 2021-02-17
Packaged: 2021-03-13 03:07:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 944
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29519907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ajproctor/pseuds/ajproctor
Summary: SPOILERS: CANON CHARACTER DEATHNancy finds a private last note from Lou’s cell.
Series: You had to kill me, but it killed you just the same [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2168592





	Lou’s notebook

_"G’day granny. What ya readin?"_

_Lou snatched the diary from the older woman’s clasp, flicking through the pages with a turned up nose, her tongue sitting between her teeth in a grin with delight at reading what she deemed to be crap._

_"What is this, Shakespeare? Today I got a visit from my son, Peter. Embracing him in a hug for the first time in months felt like coming home; the bittersweet memories holding me tight as we talked about everything that had been happening in our lives"._

_She chucked the diary back onto Nancy’s lap, making her flinch in response. Nancy couldn’t pretend that Lou’s mocking didn’t hurt her but she straightened out the bent pages and looked up at the scrappy young girl leaning against the door with her arms crossed._

_"I think everybody should write a diary. Even you could write one", she tried to encourage, though part of her already knew her words would be led astray.  
_

_"You’ve gotta be jokin’", Lou retorted, laughing at what Nancy had tried to suggest._

_"I’m being serious, Lou. You could create some beautiful things if you put your mind to it"._

_"I’m not writin’ nothin’ for no one", she snarled. Having had enough of Nancy’s nagging, though only Lou could call that nagging, she trailed herself down the corridor, bored._

  
  


Nancy sat back against the bed, her face tense, Lou’s notebook half open in the palm of her hand. It was hard to believe that a person like Lou was capable of writing something to heartfelt yet she had... and Nancy felt a pain in her chest as she remembered where Lou was. Dead. After having gotten what she wanted... but most of all, she was touched that Lou had actually taken Nancy’s advice and started writing. It wasn’t in a diary structure by any means, it was more like feelings completely poured out on a page which Nancy found to be even more heart wrenching. 

She closed the book, tenderly, as she didn’t want it to look like it had been tampered with too much. The cell seemed so empty without Lou taking up space on the bed with a magazine. So did the recreation room, dining room, the garden... it was all so bare and although Lou was unbearably obnoxious, the place sure was missing her.

Not being able to withstand it any longer, Lou’s words played in Nancy’s mind as she made her way to the dining room. Where everyone was happy, carefree, some even triumphant. They had no idea.

"Find your knittin’ needle?" Rita greeted Nancy with the question. Nancy shook her head, still concerned with what she had just discovered. "No, I can’t find it anywhere”. She said, though she had only looked for a few moments, a couple of those having been taken up by looking in what had been Lou and Alice’s dorm, where she found Lou’s notebook. "Ah, it’ll turn up. Bangers and mash for tea, your favourite", Rita gave Nancy a friendly squeeze which forced Nancy to relax. Rita never failed to cheer her up, it’s like she always knew when she needed it. 

Some time later Nancy entered her and Rita’s cell and peered at the blue cover of Lou’s notebook that now sat wedged between her own diary and a book. Because Lou wasn’t here any more and Nancy had found it, she had decided to keep it so that it didn’t get thrown out or worse, someone find it and share it with all the women which she knew Lou would’ve detested. She sighed as she sat on her bed, thinking about things.

"Cheer up, things can’t be that bad", Rita seemed to pounce into the room, flinging her weight across it and onto her own bed. "Oh hello Rita. I was just thinking about what’s happened over the last few days". Nancy told the truth, as she always did with her friends in here, especially Rita as she knew she would be lying if she said otherwise.

"Wanna talk about it?" Rita sat up and went over to a forlorn Nancy.

"I suppose I’m still a little worked up about Lou Kelly’s death. I know we didn’t see eye to eye but it’s still awful... she was so young and well I feel responsible in a way. You see, I reached out to Alice and befriended her. If I’d have done the same for Lou, maybe she would’ve... learnt to trust me or at least know that someone was in her corner, whether she showed it or not..."

Nancy fell into Rita’s open arms and they sat there for a minute, Rita contemplated.

"You have nothing to feel responsible for, okay? I see what you’re gettin’ at but she wouldn’t have accepted it. You have to admit she would’ve been one hell of a handful”, Rita chuckled a little and Nancy nodded, smiling at the accuracy. "She would’ve. But if it could’ve saved her life..."

Nancy parted a little from Rita, looked at her with big eyes. "She just needed a friend, Rita. She had no idea how friendship even works, nobody had taught her. If someone had’ve been patient with her, she could’ve been a wonderful person”.

Rita looked at Nancy, confused to how she could know all of this. But instead of protesting she nodded and let Nancy lean her head on her shoulder. "You’re mad, Nance. But I love ya".   
  
Having grown fond of her cell mate and good friend, Nancy smiled into the shoulder of the taller woman as she began to feel at ease for the first time in days. "I love you too, Rita".   
  


**Author's Note:**

> I didn’t know how to end it, sorry 😭😂


End file.
